Articles on this Page
- 12/07/17--08:31: _Bring Life To Limp ...
- 12/08/17--08:05: _You are JOY, being ...
- 12/08/17--08:00: _Anita Hill & Our Au...
- 12/08/17--09:39: _Holiday Shopping In...
- 12/08/17--10:04: _Do Men Feel Entitle...
- 12/10/17--10:20: _The Only Choice Tha...
- 12/10/17--16:13: _How to Instantly Le...
- 12/11/17--08:00: _And The Winners Of ...
- 12/11/17--08:30: _5 Reasons You Shoul...
- 12/11/17--13:04: _Liberal White Women...
- 12/12/17--08:25: _Tell Us What You Lo...
- 12/12/17--10:45: _Yo Gurl JoJo Shows ...
- 12/12/17--11:03: _The Emotional Pros ...
- 12/13/17--08:30: _Make These DIY Recy...
- 12/13/17--08:31: _7 Ways To Avoid Wei...
- 12/13/17--08:31: _The Importance of S...
- 12/04/17--09:51: _Shea Moisture Found...
- 12/05/17--06:15: _Watch These Little ...
- 12/05/17--08:15: _Tell Us Your Fav We...
- 12/14/17--08:43: _Decrease Under Eye ...
- 12/08/17--08:05: You are JOY, being human!
- 12/08/17--09:39: Holiday Shopping Inspiration From IndigoStyle Vintage, Brooklyn
- 12/08/17--10:04: Do Men Feel Entitled To Sex?
- 12/10/17--10:20: The Only Choice That Matters.
- 12/10/17--16:13: How to Instantly Level Up.
- 12/11/17--08:00: And The Winners Of The Taitu's Botanicals Hair & Body Bundle Is...
- 12/11/17--08:30: 5 Reasons You Should STOP Searching For Your Soul Mate
- 12/12/17--10:45: Yo Gurl JoJo Shows Us How To Make An Easy DIY Deodorant!
- 12/12/17--11:03: The Emotional Pros & Cons Of DNA Testing
- 12/13/17--08:31: 7 Ways To Avoid Weight Gain During The Holidays
- 12/13/17--08:31: The Importance of Self-Care as a Single Woman
- 12/05/17--06:15: Watch These Little Naturals Handle Sunday Washday Like Champs!
- 12/14/17--08:43: Decrease Under Eye Lines & Wrinkles With This Home Remedy!
|Jasmine aka CurlyGaisha|
Look at you, you’re already smiling! 😊You’re so damn gorgeous when you’re being yourSELF! Your energy is changing. You’re starting to feel a gentle, go(o)d feeling, ‘joy’— it started as a warmth in your chest as that smile spread across your face, but now it’s unfurling, it’s radiating brilliantly throughout that body. You can even feel a little tingle in those hands as they cradle the phone. Now your shoulders are relaxing, and you notice you’re sitting (or standing) up straighter, more confidently— you’re feeling, remembering, embodying your power. And with every breath you take, your body becomes more and more alive. It’s teeming with life! It’s as if the air is enriched with JOY. And as you inhale through your heart, you feel so go(o)d you can barely contain it. In fact you can’t contain it and you shouldn’t! You’re smiling bigger now! 😊😃😆You want to share this joy, this uncaused bliss with everyone you meet today! You want to light their candle too! That is your purpose. To do everything you can to support and express and maintain these go(o)d feels by sharing it with others in your own unique way. And the more you live from this powerful awareness and give of these go(o)d feels to the checkout lady, the stranger on the subway, your petty coworker, your children, or your passion project, the more you receive. These go(o)d feels begin appearing in the world as the ‘stuff’, ‘the added things’ you think you want and need. And then one day, shit flips and you laugh— you aren’t just aware of the joy, you are joy, aware of itself! You always have been and always will be. Your only ‘job’ is to stay woke. Stay present. Stay consciously aware of joy and everything will fall into place.
You’re getting this. I love you.
These past few months have been consumed with talk of sexual harassment. For the rest of his life, at least in the public space, Harvey Weinstein will be this generation's poster child for sexual assault and harassment. Even though he was far from the first or last man to use his power to intimidate women, he's the one who opened up the floor for everyone else to be exposed. And since his downfall, we've seen men like Matt Lauer, Al Franken, Louis C.K., Russell Simmons (and I'm sure more to come) meet similar fates.
Most women, the group who have been the most affected and impacted by sexual assault, from the beginning of humanity, recognize that this reckoning is long overdue. Finally, the nation is having very real and uncomfortable conversations. And while I think that a majority of people understand the necessary ramifications behind sexual assault and harassment: firings, oustings, loss in income, being exposed, etc.; I've learned that not everyone gets it.
|IndigoStyle Vintage in BK|
I'm a vintage girl. Always have been. There's something about finding gently-used gems that no one else will have at a fraction of the retail price that turns me on. So when Sheryl Roberts- a woman I've known for years on the commercial and TV circuit, she's shot a zillion TV commercials and ads so perhaps you've seen her face- opened a vintage boutique in Bedsty, Brooklyn, I knew one day I'd make the trip there. Well, it's the holidays so no better time than now to find holiday inspiration! Here are a few fun looks that my bff/stylist Dani G., and I, put together. Hope you like!
|Indigostyle Vintage owner Sheryl Roberts|
By Veronica Wells
A couple of months ago, I was interviewing three women about sex over the age of 50, for my websiteNoSugarNoCream. During the conversation, the youngest woman in the group explained that she was so thankful that when she’s not in the mood, her husband doesn’t cop an attitude. She said, “A man can be very mean when he can’t get what he wants.” For some reason, the words and the sentiment behind the words stuck with me. There were nods and grunts of agreement from the other two women, and it made me wonder, was this something other women had experienced as well?
First, I started with a friend named Yvonne. Yvonne is single at the moment but has been in more than a few non-committed or loosely defined relationships. So I asked her if the men from her past ever copped an attitude when she refused sex.
She said, one man, Peter*, used her unwillingness to have sex as a way to attack her character.
“He said I wasn’t affectionate enough and he resented the fact that I wouldn’t send him pictures of myself. He would use my lack of emotion/not being sexual with him when he demanded as an excuse for him to ignore me. He would say sh*t like ‘he’s a man” and he isn’t going to beg me to be a woman for him because other women would do it at the drop of a dime.”I should note that while Peter made all types of requests from Yvonne, she couldn’t even get him to return a text message. She concluded that this man viewed her as a toy.
The women of “The Real,” addressed this topic on their show one day and said that the men in their lives had been known to get a little attitude but nothing like what Yvonne described.
I’m not here to play relationship hierarchy. But the women who were in more committed, defined relationships had different experiences. One woman, Shanice, who had been with her man, the father of her children for over ten years, spoke about how her mental state affects her desire for sex for extended periods of time and how her man responds to that.
“I often put off having sex because my moods are so inconsistent. I'm bipolar manic, (and untreated because I refuse to take meds, but that's another story), so it can take the smallest thing to just turn me off and not want to have sex for long periods of time, or it can be opposite and I want it a lot. However, Kareem* has never acted out against it, or done catty things. He has a very mild temper and just goes with the flow. However, when it does begin to bother him that I won't have sex with him he speaks out on it. He just makes comments about how he has needs too. Or he’ll say something like, ‘Who knows when I'll have sex again.’ So I'll feel bad and give up the booty within 48 hours. There are also times where I promise it, and then say, ‘Oh I'm tired. Etc.’ It makes me feel like crap at times, but sometimes I don't care. He just takes his frustrations to sleep. I don't have any experience where he has been cruel, or made threats about getting it elsewhere.”This state of sleep theme came up more than once in my little focus group. I spoke to a man, about one of his married male friends. I should note that while this man is an excellent father, he’s a serial cheater. He told our mutual friend that when his wife refuses sex, he sleeps peacefully because he knows he has options, options he’ll act on. I don’t issue that as a cautionary tale. I’m willing to bet that even if his wife never rejected him, he would still be out here. It’s just interesting to note that he’s not pressed.
Another married woman, Karen, who’s been with her husband for 13 years said that while her husband never does or says anything cruel to her, she can tell that he gets a little “crunchy.”
“If it's been a while, say like a week or two, he gets irritable. Sex in general, for us, takes off the edge. Without it, we both get crunchy. After we connect, issues seem to calm down. He's never gotten mad though if I say no, and there are definitely times when I'm just not in the mood. If I'm not, sometimes I'll go ahead anyway- because once we get started, I’m good- but I don't always give in.”Like Shanice, Karen spoke more about the pressure women feel when they’re not in the mood...at all, but also want to satisfy their husbands.
“I have never really felt the need to have sex after having my two babies, but did because I know that he'd been waiting and he was clear about his excitement once the doctor gave us the go ahead. (The recommended time for sex after childbirth is four-six weeks.) I didn't want to make him keep waiting, and I also wondered if I'd ever 'feel' like it after a baby. I didn't want to become one of those women who has the baby and they lose their sex drive altogether. Now did he 'pressure' me? Maybe a little because he wasn't necessarily asking me how I really felt. But never has my husband acted like I have no choice, or treated me mean when I've said no."
Can you stand firm in your go(o)d feels—unbothered, unshook, smiling and at peace? Or are you gonna seemingly give ‘them’, the power to upset you again, to knock you off balance?
Don’t let their mood, their energy, bring you down. Don’t let your vibe depend on their vibe. It has nothing to do with you. Mind YOUR business. Don’t dip.
You have to do something different if you want to see something different, and it will feel unnatural until it doesn’t. You are not a victim. You are waking up to your power. I love you
Let’s do it together, right now. Notice your breath. In. Out. Nice! Smile, 😊 BIGGER 😆 Now, listen for the silence. Keep smiling. Don’t think about it, just listen. Cock that left ear and listen for the silence that’s under all the thoughts. Listen like you’re listening to see if you hear the baby stirring in the other room. Listen like it’s after 1am and you’re waiting to see when Bae is gonna try to creep in after a night out. Listen to the silence and the space that allows all the other noises to be. Listen for the silence, listen to the space— it’s in you and all around you. That’s where the joy is. And you’re feeling it now— subtly, in your chest as you stay aware of your smile. You feel the peace, the joy in the silence as you breathe in and out. It’s getting stronger. You’re breathing in the joy. You feel the joy as the silence. That joy you’re feeling right now, it’s always here! It’s you. This is HER. You’re being HER, now.
And when you’re being HER, you ‘die to your past’ (your thoughts were the only thing keeping it alive, anyway) and your future, once predictable, is now teeming with endless possibilities. You notice that you’re thinking her empowering thoughts, feeling her feels, living her confidence. If you stay here longer you’ll be taking her actions— responding to her life situations. And if you make being HER (aka feeling go(o)d)) a habit, the ‘out there’, will begin reflecting HER beliefs, her world, back to you. You are now living HER life, your true potential. You are being fully yourSELF for the first time. Welcome home.
Smile, girl. You’re getting this. Smile. Shift. Stay. Like nothing else matters.
Taitu's Botanicals Tea Tree & Lavender Hair & Body Bundle
Happy Monday Ladies!
Are you ready to find out the two winners of the Taitu's Botanicals Tea Tree & Lavender Hair & Body Bundle?!?!
|Taitu's Botanicals Tea Tree & Lavender Hair & Body Bundle|
And the winners are.......
Congrats Winners! You have 1 week to claim your prize. Please email email@example.com with your full name and address using Taitu's Botanicals Winner in the subject line. Enjoy the products, and stay tuned because we'll be announcing another giveaway tomorrow!!!
By Cia Edwards
And they lived happily ever after…
Or maybe they didn’t. As soon as our hormones kick in, we tend to gravitate to the notion that we have to find our “soul mate.” Or even the idea that there is someone out there who matches our personality and characteristics perfectly, which make them our perfect match.
However, how many of us who are in exclusive relationships can really say we’ve met our soulmate? And for the percentage of us who think we have met our “soul mates,” how many of us can say that they are 100% perfect in every aspect of their being?
Coming from a biblical standpoint, there is nowhere in the Bible that states that God has made us a soul mate that we must be with. Before you stick a pitchfork in my mouth, and start shouting Adam and Eve, let’s go back and dissect that story briefly.
God created Eve because He stated that, man should not live alone. NOT that man has to have a perfect match! However there are multiple places in the Bible that states that God’s love is sufficient for us.
Song of Solomon 3:4 - “I have found the one whom my soul loves.” <- - - - - (not soul mate!)
Granted, there are many scriptures that do highlight the concept of our souls loving another but it doesn’t always have a romantic connotation to the meaning.
So do “Soul Mates” exist in the Bible? No, you’re welcome.
Now that we have the biblical piece set aside let’s go into the reasons as to why you should probably stop searching for your “happy ever after” to marry.
1. Searching for your soul mate can possibly inhibit you from truly understanding to love yourself first.
2. You may have a person that matches you perfectly, but they may be permanently friend zoned.
You ask a person to describe their soul mate their responses typically go something like this, “He connects with me on all levels, he’s my perfect match.” Or “She is like the missing half of me, it’s like she looks into my soul.” Well my friends, what you have described may be a disaster because those qualities don’t indicate any source of individuality. If you describe your soul mate as your “twin” or other half you could also be describing a friend. Most of our friendships exists because they immediately connect with us and sometimes act as our twins. So please be aware that your perfect match doesn’t always have to be your next Husband or Wife! Sometimes the people who we feel the most connected to is there just to serve a specific purpose, not to give you your next 24 karat ring! #FACTS
3. Life is not meant to be a fairy tale where as soon as a problem arises it’s fixed and the end stays happy forever.
If you truly believe finding a soul mate will make your life the next fairy tale, please pinch yourself…twice. When was the last time you had a fight with your best friend? Did you not end up in an argument probably a few months down the line? If you truly believe finding the perfect guy will solve the repetitive pattern you’ve had with relationship qualms, you’re wrong. Fairy tales are meant to be just that, Fairy-Enchanted Tale-Myth.
Arguments will come, and so will solutions! There is no Prince Charming or Princess Tiana in the world that will substitute the lessons learned from trials.
4. With 7.5 billion people in the world how will you connect with them all on your tedious “search.”
Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat does in fact help us connect with different people from all walks of the earth but there is no way we can possibly connect with them all! Some may say, “God will most likely put my soul mate in my vicinity.” Well, I may say something like, “So you’re gonna go out with every female in Brooklyn?” Most likely the answer is no. There are way too many people out there who are similar to us, that may even be our counterpart doppelganger. This does not change the fact that the entire nation is populated with over 7 billion potential “soul mates” that you would have to sift through to “find” yours. So stop looking, because if someone is meant for you, trust me, you won’t have to search.
5. You may pass on great opportunities with connections if you’re too fixated on your soul mate.
It’s simple. If you’re too focused on not dating that girl because she doesn’t have the same ethnic background as you, or that guy because he’s a janitor and not a lawyer, then you are limiting yourself! These people you may pass by, could be your next ticket to a billion dollar idea, but it won’t be your billion dollar idea because you refused to date or even network with them. Don’t ever be too fixated on finding your “soul mate.” They don’t really exist.
|Photo via nbcnews.com|
“Great question my friend! I am so far removed from anyone that would think like this. My guess is that it’s a brainwashed Southern thing.”So my next question is how did she grow up? She says that her family was very liberal.
“We celebrated different cultures and ways of life and freedom to be. My mother was Quaker and my father came from a Christian background, but won’t touch religion with a 10-foot-pole. He’s more of a Spiritual poet.”It would explain Anne and her sister’s open-mindedness. Very interesting. But I still need to find out why white women keep voting for Pedophiles!
I reach out to Nancy* from a mommy group I belong to here in Jersey City. This group mixes women from all types of different backgrounds, and a lot of them are politically active. Though Nancy says she can’t say 100 percent, she goes straight for what we might consider the obvious.
“I think it all circles back to racism, but some not even intentional, meaning they aren't even aware that they are being racist. So you have your flat out racists who hear the dog-whistle comments and are totally thinking that THESE guys get it. They are going to make sure that they keep out those Mexicans and stop giving money to those welfare babies. Then there's this big portion- and I know this because I see people I knew in high school that really don't understand- who don't view themselves as racists. They do however completely suffer from white privilege. They are white, middle class, have never lived in an urban area, they love their black friends and co-workers (see, they have black friends so they aren't racist wink-wink), they are, however, finding it harder to stay middle class. There aren't as many jobs, their pay isn't increasing, they are struggling to keep up with the Jones's. All their lives they've voted Conservative. Their parents were in unions, they go to church, they've worked hard and have reaped the rewards. They haven't faced the same obstacles P.O.C. have. So they, in their bubble, don't understand how you didn't just work hard and get ahead. If you aren't, you’re just not trying hard enough. It's a formula that's always worked for them. Except now, it's not. They haven't yet put together that the Republican party isn't looking out for them. That it's their policies that have failed them. They are still thinking that if they stay with a Conservative party that the cream will rise to the top.”She also points to Conservative “Christian” values.
“Good women are docile and support their men no matter what. Men can't control their impulses when women of ill repute tempt them. All bullshit, but I've heard this nonsense. Unless it’s happened to them, they think that a lot of women ask for it. It’s a complete disconnect from reality, but their bubble is safe.”She concludes by saying that she believes a lot of Christian white women will go down with the ship.
|Photo via The Atlantic|
“Its fear of losing a way of life that they understand even though it may not serve them best, fear of losing the protection and support of their spouses who are voting for the embodiment of evil because that evil preserves their supremacy.”She goes on to compare it to a woman staying in an abusive relationship.
“Maybe they hope that by throwing others under the bus they will be spared the same fate. White women are caught in this place between privileged and oppressed, andit’s easier to pretend that we are on the side of power than under the boot.”She then turns the question around to ask me if I know anyone who has voted against themselves?
My answer is no. I don’t know any black women who supported Trump, and I hope that none I know would vote for a Roy Moore, however, I know people who still support Bill Cosby, though more than 50 women have accused him of some form of sexual assault. I know black women still flock to R. Kelly concerts though it’s well-known that he’s had sexual relations with minors, making him a Pedophile. There’s also Clarence Thomas. We could also do better, and hopefully as more women continue to come forward with their stories of assault (#metoo), we will stop supporting those who don't support us. Clearly, there is work to do, though this is not about comparing. As it relates to the Senate race taking place tomorrow in Alabama, it's anyone's guess what the outcome will be. But it will be a telling sign as to what direction women, at least Conservative and white, are heading.
|The "Holiday"& "Langston" Candle|
Wouldn't it be nice to fill your home with the scent of Billie Holiday or Langston Hughes? Imagine the inspiration it could bring...Well, all you have to do is tell us what you love about your work- whether you're in school, a stay-at-home mom, a social worker, teacher, blogger, or starting your own business- it's all good, just inspire us with what makes it so great! In return, we're giving away 4 candles from the amazing Harlem Candle Company! Good Luck!
The Langston candle celebrates his unwavering optimism and his creative vision with an accord reflecting some of the strong symbols in his life… the worn vintage leather of his favorite armchair, aromatic tobacco laced with a hint of clove and vanilla from the pipes of neighborhood men wafting through his open window, and the sweet ambery incense that recalls his many visits to churches in Mexico.
Tell us what you like about your work in the comment section below and 4 lucky winners will be given either a Langston or Holiday candle from HarlemCandleCompany.com! They have THE BEST candles so by all means, check them out! Winners will be announced on Monday, December 18th! Good Luck!
By Nikki Igbo
On my mother’s side of the family tree, we can trace certain roots back to the 16th century. The lineage leads to a collection of nobles and landed gentry who had the power and resources to literally own people. Other than the discovery that Barack Obama and I share a common ancestor, I can’t say I’m thrilled with these revelations. As if anyone cares how these people relate to me. As if anyone would classify me as White or European because of it.
I wanted to know about the people who gave me my Black identity so I decided to test my DNA.
When I first learned of Black celebs like Danny Glover and Forest Whitaker being able to trace their lineage back to their specific African origins, I wanted to learn my truth as well but I thought I’d have to get rich first and/or rob a bank. Luckily DNA testing has advanced considerably in capability and affordability. Taking advantage of today’s brave new world, I recently received my results.
Turns out that my African ancestry accounts for 85% of my heritage. I’m 53% Nigerian and 13% Senegalese with some Bantu, Beninese and Togolese ties. Learning this about myself left me with some great emotional highs but also a few misgivings. After chatting with a fellow friend and writer, Afropunk editorialist Erin White, I found I wasn’t alone.
PRO: Pride and joy in knowing.
“The results made me want to purchase all sorts of things with the Cameroonian flag on it,” Erin said of her initial reaction to her 30% Cameroonian, 19% Beninese/Togolese, 17% Ivorian/Ghanaian heritage. I knew exactly what she was saying. I felt as if I’d gained entrance to an exclusive, elite membership—as if I’d learned I was heir to a great kingdom. And still that doesn’t quite describe my happiness. I am connected to Nigeria in marriage, motherhood and within my own blood. To think that the life I’ve built indicates that I somehow already knew brings me to tears every time I think about it.
PRO: Seeing myself with new eyes.
I am Nigerian. That feeling I got after I read 'Things Fall Apart' in third grade. My infatuation with egusi soup and jollof rice. My deep appreciation for language and storytelling. My obsession with entrepreneurship. The way strong family and community means everything to me. The way my rare periaucular sinuses match my husband, my in-laws and a whole lot of people in Afikpo. Yeah, that’s straight up Naija. My husband always told me to say “I’m Nigerian” whenever anyone asked my background. Until the test, I always felt the need to explain why I claimed to be Nigerian. “I’m from California, I’m African-American married to a Nigerian man, yadda.” I felt like I was perpetrating if I didn’t. These days I’m just waiting for the next person to ask me. I wonder how it will feel to say it then.
PRO: The question mark ends with me.
CON: The adjustment of owning a newly-discovered heritage.
“I felt a slight uneasiness over the implication of the presence of Whiteness in my DNA," Erin confided. “It’s still not totally clear to me what context these White people were ‘involved’ with my family, outside of being from two of my great grand-parents. Were these consensual interracial relationships near the turn of the 20th century? Doubtful.”
That troubled me somewhat as well.
CON: The need to know more.
I put off taking the test for a pretty lengthy amount of time because I wondered if I would be satisfied with simply knowing my ethnic makeup only. Before the test, I wondered about the language and dialect my ancestors spoke, the clothing they wore, the songs they sang, the recipes they loved, the way they braided or wrapped their hair, the witty little sayings and proverbs they passed down to each other.
Erin noted, “Getting the results of your DNA test will likely lead to more questions, and that can be a lot of fun, but to get real answers, it can cost a lot of money, too.”
For now, it’s enough for me to know this puzzle piece. I have a strong identity in being African-American. Nigerian-American. I don’t know how long it will take for me to get used to saying it, to get comfortable inside this marriage of histories...what I’ve gained in the knowledge, and the baggage I’ve lost.
By Jashia Wadehra
It’s that time of year! The grocery shopping never ends and neither do the school bake sales, friendsgivings, secret Santa’s or gift exchanges.
As a kid, I️ LOVED bringing my friends treats for every holiday and my birthday. And when money was tight and the $0.99 store was within walking distance, I️ learned to be resourceful. I’d start by hoarding my mom’s Trader Joe or other pretty grocery store bags post her shopping excursions. Then I’d make my way to the dollar store and pick up some standard thin glossy ribbon.
This DIY craft project is perfect to do with the your kids during the holiday season, or even for various holiday events! This year I intend on making a handful and filling them with travel-sized toiletries for a local shelter- get creative!
|Photo via appforhealth.com|
Alcohol and weight management don't go well together. First of all, alcoholic drinks are full of calories which we often ignore. This means that alcohol has its own share of calories you should look out for. Secondly, alcohol lowers your self-control when it comes to eating. You might find yourself going for seconds and thirds when you're intoxicated. So stay away from alcohol or limit your alcohol intake during the holidays.
Focus on having fun
Stay away from the food
Seriously! Stay away from the food especially at holiday parties. Your proximity to it makes it easier to binge eat. It's always safe to stay as far as possible from the kitchen or the table where the food is. To make this more manageable, ensure that you don't attend a holiday party while hungry. Always eat some food or a nutritious snack to make it easier for you to manage your eating habits. You can also drink a glass of water beforehand just to fill up your stomach a bit.
Balance in the proteins and fiber
Holiday meals are full of carbs which translates to a lot of calories. With this in mind, you should make a conscious decision to eat more protein and fiber rich foods. Good sources of protein include poultry, legumes, fish and red meat. You can get fiber from legumes, nuts, seeds, vegetables, fruits and whole grains. For every serving of carbs you eat, ensure you eat a serving or two of proteins and fiber. Eating proteins automatically reduces the amount of calories you eat by increasing the levels of appetite-reducing hormones to reduce appetite and also increases your metabolism. On the other hand, fiber induces fullness thus making you eat less.
Pick a smaller plate
Always pick a small plate whenever possible especially at a buffet. This means that you'll need less food to fill your plate hence making you eat less. Choosing a smaller plate makes it easier to control your portions easily. You'll be able to enjoy your meal without overindulging yourself with the calories. If you can't find a smaller plate, use your best judgement to estimate food portions that are appropriate for you.
Manage your stress levels
Holidays can be really stressful, especially if you're organizing and hosting parties. You have to find a way to keep those stress levels down. Research has shown that stress prompts the increase of a hormone called cortisol in the body. Cortisol has been linked to triggering high appetite and cravings which lead to overeating and weight gain. Some of the things you can do to control your stress levels include deep breathing, meditation, yoga and exercise.
Make your own food
If you want to control the calories during the holiday season, make your own food as often as you can. Although it might be more convenient to buy boxed mashed potatoes and other processed holiday foods, they contain unhealthy fats and excess sugar. These are definitely not good for you if your aim is weight management. Instead of the boxed food, focus on making your own meals from scratch so that you can control the ingredients and stay on top of your weight.
Following these tips will help you avoid gaining extra pounds during the holidays. However, it is normal to slip up once or twice. The important thing is not to give up and get back on track even after you let your guard down.
“Sometimes it feels easier to let others do our hard work for us. But at the end of the day, learning how to lean into our self-love, stand tall in our self-care, and understand that we too are capable of loving ourselves just as hard as an outsider may, we have to show up. We have to do the work and become self-aware. Even when it’s uncomfortable. Even when we don’t want to. No one can love you like you can. Outside love validation feels good, it’s needed sometimes. But that internal self-acceptance matters. Learning how to love yourself when no one is looking or there to say “good job” is necessary as you journey through life. Don’t let the fear of facing your truth stop you from showing up for yourself in the way you deserve.”
|Sundial Founder Richelieu Dennis|
It was a festive evening at Ginny’s Supper Club, the intimate downstairs lounge at Red Rooster in Harlem last week. I was there tagging along with my girl Sid, who gets invited everywhere, and honestly, anytime I can get away from an evening of doing homework with the kids is cause to get lit! Everyone else, however, was there to celebrate the merger between Sundial, the parent company that owns Shea Moisture, Nubian Heritage, Madame C.J. Walker and nyako, with Unilever, a multinational company that generated over 50 billion in sales last year. Although the amount of the merger was not made public, one can guess from the fact that Sundial is expected to turn over an estimated $240 million this year, that it ain’t too shabby. Sundial founder Richelieu Dennis will continue as CEO and executive chairman for the company that he started in 1991 with his mom and longtime friend, Nyema Tubman, all Liberians unable to return to the country once Civil War broke. Here are some highlights from the evening, along with the deets on the 100 million that Sundial plans to give black women!
After a few drinks and some mixing and mingling with familiar and unfamiliar faces, Michaela Angela Davis, image activist and longtime consultant to the company, gets on the mic to introduce the man of honor, simply known as Rich. For anyone who remembers Rich from his days of selling soap out of his car in Harlem, or when he owned Nubian Heritage bookstore on 125th street and 5th Ave, a source of pride in the community long before gentrification, you know he’s come a long way. Michaela compares Rich’s success to hip hop.
“You started off on the street selling ounces of Shea, and now you’re in business!" she joked, saying that he was selling ounces of Shea when others were selling "other" things.
Rich walks up with his mama in tow, and Michaela explains that she is the real star of the company. It’s easy to see why. She’s a sweet-looking petite older lady, round, and soft spoken when she does speak. But don’t let the calm demeanor fool you. Introducing her as the most incredible human being he knows, Rich told a helluva story about how she wasn’t the type of mom to dish out praises growing up. In fact, if he received all A’s on his report card she said nothing. But if he came home with a B that was his a$s straight. He learned the level of excellence that was expected in her house and today he wouldn’t have it any other way.
|Sundial Founders Rich Dennis, (mom) Mary Dennis and Nyema Tubman|
“If it wasn’t for that, the levels of excellence that we strive to have would not be here. So as I’ve lived my life and built this company with my college roommate, and co-founder Nyema, it’s been about excellence, thinking differently, caring about the people we care about deeply, and more than anything else, giving back to where we came from. This partnership allows us to do that. It gives us the infrastructure to do what we want to do."And what is that exactly? He plans to develop communities, with a focus on black female entrepreneurs.
“Women of color are the backbone of our communities and the most under-served. This partnership allows us to impact women like my grandmother, single mothers like my mother, women from around the world who have an idea, but no resources. She may find it hard to get a loan from the bank, or she’s got a product that no one believes in. We want to take some of those obstacles out of her way.”It makes sense, coming from a man who is making a quarter of a billion dollars off of his grandmama’s recipes. It sounds even better coming from their website.
Obviously, he had to address people who say he’s selling out. To that he says the products aren’t going to change and because of how his business model is set up, he prefers the term ‘investing in.’
Imagine all those black women with family recipes that have been there for generations. Everything from hair and body products, natural cures for aches and pains, food recipes...anybody perfect their Granny's mac & cheese? It's endless. And to think that black women are already the fasting growing group of entrepreneurs in this country! So the next question is how to apply, because we're definitely going to follow-up on this. We'll keep you posted with info. on our end, but also research it on your own to figure out how to get a piece of the pie!
Michaela Angela Davis and Founder & CEO of Sundial Brands, Richelieu Dennis chat with Incoming EVP & COO of Unilever North America Personal Care Esi Eggleston Bracey about this groundbreaking purpose-driven partnership.
|Railey aka 'Sweet'& Danica aka 'Squeeze'|
We all know that Sunday Washday for many naturals can be a drag, but these little ladies handle it like champs, and remind us what it feels like to be a kid again! See how this mom uses Mielle Organics to help maintain, grow & revitalize Squeeze and Sweet's hair. Feel free to share, and subscribe to their Squeeze & Sweet's Learning Center youtube channel for more fun and educational videos!
|Taitu's Botanicals Tea Tree & Lavender Hair & Body Bundle|
We've got another fab giveaway! This week, we're asking you to tell us your favorite websites and why for a chance to win 2 Taitu's Botanicals Tea Tree & Lavender Hair & Body Bundles!
|Taitu's Botanicals Tea Tree & Lavender Hair & Body Bundle|
Tell us your favorite websites and why in the comment section for a chance to win! 2 Winners will be announced next Monday, December 11th! Good Luck!!!
Fine lines and wrinkles ? I’m all too familiar.
Thanks to hours in front of my laptop and years of atopic eczema and variations of chronic dermatitis, I, in my early 20’s, suffer from fine under eye lines and wrinkly lids. While I have yet to find a cure for this, I have found a home remedy that has decreased the depth, visibility and reoccurrence of my wrinkles!
Tell your man or woman to get you some ROSES because baby, you’re going to need a bouquet!
Rose contains vitamin A which help promote new skin cells and tightening. I discovered this remedy when I was tired of applying immunosuppressants and steroids to my skin for the eczema and retinol for the wrinkles. The sun sensitivity, inflammation and redness were more unsightly than the root cause itself!
The best part is the scent is very subtle. It does not have an overwhelming rose scent at all.
Here is one of my favorite brands Majestic Pure Rosehip Oil for Face, Nails, Hair and Skin, Pure & Natural, Cold Pressed Premium Rose Hip Seed Oil, 4 oz.
Stay patient and persistent. Results for me started to show around day 10. This has been a constant part of my skincare routine for about 3 months!
This won’t eradicate your lines, but it will definitely help! Ain’t nothing wrong with aging gracefully..... I’m just trying to, you know, put it on layaway?!